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Guys and Girls...
I'm back again.. A week after my last post...
I'm here in a room...
A twin sharing room, a mattress and a single door small cupboard por mi...
My school name is SMK Pusat Penyelidikan Pertanian Tun Razak, Jerantut Pahang...
Yes, I am back to my hometown... ok... HOMETOWN... but so not hommy for me...
Well... I guess I gotta get used to this school...
An excellent Principal...
A good school..
An all malay school... from the students, to the teachers, the staffs as well as the canteen workers... (I'm exaggerating... they do have 2 Indian students..)
ALLAH...
I need you... wherever and whenever and whatever I'll be going, and I'll be doing later...
because without you... I am clueless... Helpless and Penniless... ALLAHUAKBAR!!!!
My oh My...
Only one week left...
Hanya seminggu...
DAMN.....
Time flies so fast...
Or.... I'm the one that move so slow???
REALITY...
1. I'll be called a GSST in a week time...
2. I'll probably have to stay on my own.... (alone or not... I don't know)
3. I'll have to live under the courtesy of my family... (Money, clothing, foods etc.) until I get my first salary which only God knows when..
4. I'll be having new students who are unlikely to be like my past students during my 3 months of practicum...
5. I'll be working officially under new people... I hardly knows anyone of them... I just hope that they are nice people... friendly and helpful... (amen...)
6. I might not be able to contact those who I am so close with now due to the business that we have to deal later on... (but please take note that I love you always...)
7. I will be crying when I eat alone early in the morning during Sahur and in the dusk during Berbuka puasa... (Oh no!! Ramadhan is coming.... I haven't finished replacing my puasa... )
8. I will have to be more efficient in managing my money... Getting my own paycheck I might be able to spend as much money I want w/o much worry about what others would say.. But hey.. Once my money finished... no one gonna gimme money anymore... (uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa T.T)
9. I'm gonna be away really away from ♡♥♡ Bubeau ♡♥♡ .... He'll be living on his own too... Earning his money... Forgetting me... (sob... sob.... T.T)
10. I might becoming a new person... Physically and Mentally.... InsyaAllah...
So peeps... All the best to all of us... in life, in work and in ♡♥♡....
Oh My God....
I guess I should never touch my hair again after this..
I'm so in rage...
I just don't know what should I do to make my hair longer again...
I don't wanna call the Nyonya at the Salon S***** or anything equivalent to that...
But I think she must have been so busy taking care of her crying baby that she become so senseless....
I am so shameful to look at my face without my 'tudung' on...
Erghhhh.....
Mari mentafsir mimpi.....
lol... hahaha....
my post in BAHASA??? (can la...)
nak kata I ingat rindukan dia sangat tu takde la pulak kn... but he keeps coming into my dreams...
Orang kata... kalau kita selalu dreamt of that somebody... it could be because of kita yang teringatkan dia... OR... that somebody yang maybe tengah rindukan kita... hahaha ♥ ♥ ♥ lah hati I dengar ni...
Malam tadi I mimpikan dia lagi.. haih... parah la camni... betul ke I sayang kat dia ni???
I also don't have the answer.... for the time being ye la kot... but in future??? when both of us are away of each other... will I still be missing him macam sekarang ni??? Only God have the answer....
I want you so badly, it's my biggest wish
I spent my time just thinkin thinkin thinkin bout you
every single day yes, i'm really missin' missin' you
and all those things we use to use to use to do
hey girl, wuz up, it use to be just me and you
i spent my time just thinkin thinkin thinkin bout you
every single day, yes i'm really missin missin you
and all those things we use to use to use to do
hey girl wuz up, wuz up, wuz up, wuz up
meet me halfway, right at the boarderline
that's where i'm gonna wait, for you
i'll be lookin out, night n'day
took my heart to the limit, and this is where i'll stay
I can't go any further then this
I want you so bad it's my only wish
girl,i travel round the world and even sail the seven seas
across the universe i go to other galexies
just tell me where you want, just tell me where you wanna to meet
i navigate myself myself to take me where you be
cause girl i want, i, i, i want you right now
i travel uptown (town) i travel downtown
i wanna to have you around (round) like every single day
i love you alway..way
can you meet me half way (I'll meet you halfway)
right at the boarderline
that's where i'm gonna wait, for you
i'll be lookin out, night n'day
took my heart to the limit, and this is where i'll stay
i can't go any further then this
i want you so bad it's my only wish
i can't go any further then this
i want you so bad it's my only wish
let's walk the bridge, to the other side
just you and I (just you and I)
i will fly, i'll fly the skies, for you and I (for you and I)
i will try, until i die, for you and i, for you and i, for for you and i,
for for you and i, for for you and i, for you and i
can you meet me half way (yup yup)
can you meet me half way (yup yup)
can you meet me half way (yup yup)
can you meet me half way (yup yup)
meet me half way, right at the boarderline
that's where i'm gonna wait, for you
i'll be lookin out, night n'day
took my heart to the limit, and this is where i'll stay
i can't go any further then this
i want you so bad it's my only wish
i can't go any further then this
I want you so bad it's my only wish
Saturday
July 3rd, 2010.
Posting oh posting...
Where are you???
Posting oh posting...
What should I do???
Posting oh posting...
People are going crazy because of you...
Posting oh posting...
When will we get to see you???
Posting oh posting...
You are just too good to true....
Hope that this issue will certainly be certain in these few days...
I just couldn't take this matter anymore...
Cause many of us are already going
CRAAAAZZZZYYYYYYYYY!!!
Saturday
July 3rd, 2010.
Love is back to me....
All of sudden....
After so long I've been waiting...
His name suddenly appear on my cell phone screen...
Hearing his voice throws away all the suspicions that he doesn't need me anymore...
I know that there are still sunshine for both of us at the end of the day....
Still a long way to go...
For now.. I am happy for this relationship...
You may not know how much I love you...
But all you need to know is that I care a lot about you....
Missing you my ♥ly BuBeau...
HAHAHA...
I Just found out these whole stocks of things to do...
Kinda interesting...
Just wanna share with those that might be in sorrow... (am I mocking myself???)
lol....
Anyway... check this cool link...
Friday
July 2nd, 2010.
It has been two weeks now...
I had finally left the 'student' title behind me...
How do I feel???
1. HAPPY - for now I am exactly got the total freedom from assignments, study, and having to follow rules set by those people.... hehehe..
2. EXCITED - I can't wait to see what's in store for my future... I can't wait to start getting my own money.. my own salary... yeah... SALARY people... not allowance anymore... (this is when you can spend your money without being monitored by others... lol :p)
3. SAD - I don't know what my life would be without my life-mates for 6 years.... Everybody is taking their own ways now... Don't know when are we going to see eachother again... CONVOCATION??? maybe... huhu~ (but that still a long way to go.... )
4. INDECISIVE - this is the hardest part that I hate the most... I hate to have this feeling... I hate to be indecisive in life.... I have reach to the point when I can't make up my mind.. to stay or to go... To hold on or to let go... To throw away or to keep it deep inside.... and it's about this love I had...
WELL.....
We never know what is in store for us next... all we can do is just pray hard that things will go as we wish...
Nobody's gonna paint our future if we don't do it ourselves... Get your life... Live it well... Grateful that you are still blessed to have your greatest treasure by yourside today... (Whoever or whatever it may be..)
Lotsa love...
Deeyah...
Life is something meant to be cherished not to be mourned about...
It is true to a certain extent. However there are still many things that make people think life isn't a bed of roses.
Whenever we think that we have all the good things in the world to make us happy there will be some hindrances that come our way. It will make us think that we are just too unlucky to have what others have... and this is always related to something that we called L.O.V.E!!!!
Many people always regard love as something that keep themselves alive. Something that lead them to wonderland. Something that take them away from misery and troubles. People are ready to drown in a ship called L.O.V.E. They are willing to sacrifice everything just to keep the hope of living together alive and they are also willing to give up any other things as long as they can keep the person they love happy. That's what L.O.V.E means to human. This makes them think that Life is bed of roses when they get whatever they want and be loved by the person they love.
L.O.V.E and ME is never in a good term... I have people that I used to love, that I still love and I will forever love. But I just find it hard to get it expressed. Not that I did not try.. Just that I choose not to express it. For I know that L.O.V.E isn't something that I should trust. Therefore, I had rather keep it for myself. I will never want it to be exposed to the person that I loved and love. And a few days ago, again, I was hurt by someone that I almost called as lover. People know my feeling for him, and I guess he can feel it too. But he was just too dumb to realize what I feel for him.. But I don't wanna blame him for that... He has no reason to like me either... I know that damn well!
HOWEVER....
to those who are reading this post... Feel free to express your feeling... Don't let your love die alive in you just like mine. Tell the person you love what you feel for them... And LIVE your L.O.V.E till the day you breathe your last breath... Muchas SUERTE!
Today marks the third day of my holiday at home....
So happy that I've finally able to smell the scent of home again....
Many others would say that life isn't that cool and fun at home... but this is a total opposite for me....
I LOVE BEING AT HOME!!!!
So what..... hahahaha....
What so fun and cool to stay at home???
1. You can sleep as early as you want and also you can have a sleepless night that you desire course no class is waiting for you in the morning....
2. You may also wake up anytime you want.....
3. There is no need for you to do your laundry.... as you have others to wash your clothes.... all you need to do is just spare some time to hang them out... hehehe
4. You don't have to worry about your breakfast, lunch, tea time, dinner, supper... all is PREPARED for you... hehe... Move your lazy butt to the kitchen and your meal is there under the 'tudung saji' for you... muahaha....
5. One most exciting thing to do at home is that... you can spend all others' money on anything you want... worry not.... no body gonna bother to use your money... but you can be the blood sucker at home...
These are 5 things that I really cherish while I'm at home... but I forgot to mention one thing... I feel safe and love to be around my FAMILY because they are the greatest gift of all I have ever had.... ♥ ♥ ♥
p/s: I don't wanna go back.... but I mish my baby.... my Silly Ladybird... how is he???
Sebelum dia mencintai aku
Begitu cepatnya dia berlalu
Meninggalkan semua
Hanya untuknya
Bila harus berakhir segalanya
Untuk kita dan untuk masa bahagia bersamamu
Selamanya dialah kekasihku
Yakinkan untukmu
Dia milikku sampai kapan jua
Hanya untuknya
Sebelum dia mencintai aku
Hanya untuknya
Which started the whole world crying.
But I didn't see.
That the joke was on me, oh no.
I started to cry,
which started the whole world laughing.
Oh if I'd only seen,
that the joke was on me.
I look at the skies, running my hands over my eyes,
and I fell out of bed hurting my head from things that I said.
Til I finally died.
Which started the whole world living.
Oh, if I'd only seen
that the joke was on me.
I look at the skies running my hands over my eyes,
and I fell out of bed hurting my head from things that I said.
Til I finally died.
Which started the whole world living.
Oh if I'd only seen, that the joke was on me,
Oh no, that the joke was on me.
This week... It marks the fourth week of this very short lecture hours semester... Two more weeks were will be officially doomed to another phase of becoming an English Teacher... *sigh*
So soon....
I thought that yesterday was just the 1st day I came here... to this very same Maktab... (Correction... It ain't a maktab anymore.... IPGM KTI). And now... After 6 years of being a teacher trainee in Maktab and also UPM... I dare not to boast that I am so ready to be called as TEACHER yet...
Having to think of the school that we are going for practicum really drives me to a state where I can declare as 'nearly insane'. This is not to underestimate the school.. but sometimes, I just wonder why didn't they just send us to a closer school to our beloved Maktab? but yeah, yeah... I would just shut my mouth up... no point of arguing or being sad upon this matter... Just chill Deeyah...
Next week....
Assignment dues....
Micro-teaching will commence.....
Unit Plan that gonna crack our mind need to be completed....
Hell yeah... so many things need to be done in this very short limited time span of the semester....
But again.... Say not a complaint....
I have chosen to be in this profession...
Gotta 'REDHA' with everything that will come before me...
I am grateful.... despite all the hardship to complete this short semester of lecture...
the friendship we have are getting stronger... I DON'T DARE to imagine how life would be after we start the practicum session...
I know that they of course life wouldn't be the same anymore...
But I just wish that................................ our F.R.I.E.N.D.S.H.I.P will always remain the same...
P/S: when I think that I have nothing to write, actually there so many things to be vomited here... till then...
2009....
Many things had taken place in my life...
Many experiences had matured me...
Many incidents had finally opened up my mind.... About human, about life, about friendship, about love...
But hey.. what happened in 2009 let them remain there... buried deep inside the passing year...
I dare not to look back.. Dare not to think how many of my wishes had I achieved in 2009...
For me...Live must go on... Whether it's 2009, 2010, or 2011...
2010....
This is the year that I've long waited.. haha (am I???)
Hell yeah... This year... It's going to be the last year of my six-year course... or to be precised..
I am gonna graduate after the first half of the year...
Then... Wanna know why I have long waited for this year???
I can't wait to go out to work.. To be officially called as 'Teacher' by my students...
BUT!!!!!
I am not ready yet to live in this second decade of the Millennium...
Am I already 24-year-old this year???? DAMN!!!!
